i <3 to rant!.. haha >:3

it's been awhile hahaha...

i have a lot to say everyday but just that i can't make into words that i can tell everyone..

yea right, like anyone will read this shit anyway..

lately many things is happening. and i not happy of what is happening around.

it's seems like everything bad is revolving around me ever since then.

it's like making a great cup of coffee but sugar is missing..

making a delicious blueberry cake with sour blueberry instead of sweet..

travelling around town knowing no where to go but to stay there and look at people passing by..

seeing them smiling or laugh at silly small joke or even little things..

what's the point anyway?

why don't i just go away and get on with my life?

that's the thing, that is my life since i fell into the deepest abyss of sorrow..

i don't want to be like this again..

i didn't choose to be this way..

i want to smile big and laugh at anything i can..

is this the curse that i hold?

is this the karma what i have done?

is this the who i suppose to be in this life?

is it me who holding myself back?

is it me the toy for the heaven's entertainment to play around?

if it's so, then why me?

i wish to change all this..

all this non-sense and all this bullshit, left it behind or lock it in the treasure chest and throw it to the sea..

or burn it with the hell fire with the pact with the demon..

i would even put up my name if i have a deathnote.. haha >:3

i know ranting doesn't help it..

it all need to happen by the will of myself..

but how you get up without anyone support you?

how to do you wanna go through the toughest day of your life without anyone encourage you to do it?

how to deal all those problems and pain in the ass without someone listen to you when you burst it?

who to turn to when things getting complicated?

in short, i felt neglected by people that i hold LOVE all this while..

i hate who's being childish enough to make others f**k up. (g-himong tanga)
left alone and lie flying toward me..

i knew they were lies but i just let it pass by..

why do i let them?

*sigh*

anyway, in our comlab they have installed a web filter..

it's annoying because all my favourite web pages been block (even soompi) sh*t..

another point for me to get furious about stuff right now..

this is very bad around me now..

and they say good people have good karma..

i will say that is bullshit..

i'm not a saint but i don't do no evil stuff..

so why don't i have at least a bit of happiness?
suckz though,.. -_-